Monday, August 20, 2012

sdrfydjjgjtljhiotjhytkojds; life is weird

I want you to shut up. Please shut up. I don’t know where I’m going in life, let me be. 
Stop telling me that I have to decide a major and that I need to go to school right out of high school. 
Stop telling me to believe in certain beliefs. 
Stop telling me how to look. 
I’ll do what I want with my life.
Sure, I’m not as accomplished as everyone else. 
Money doesn’t define anything. 
I could care less that I could end up homeless. 
If I’m happy, I'm fine. 
It’s easier for me to do something that I’m happy about than waste my entire life on some drudgery that won’t bring me any joy.
That’s final. 
So much is on my mind right now…
It’s been like that a lot lately, no one to really talk to about alllll of it.
My mind is where I have all my privacy. I enjoy it that way.
I don’t really know how to describe or say how I feel these days.
It’s just been a really crazy jumbled mess.
So much change… I don’t like any of it.

One of the only things that’s help my sanity is reading, sleeping, music, talking to my favorite people. Which has narrowed down to 3 people already….
I plan on staying up all day.
Mom is at work, Rachel is going to a friends later on in the day, Ryan does what he does, Dad is not here... I don’t think… Pretty sure.

Never drink warm snapple tea… it’s weird, not bad, just, not good.
I should probably be very productive today… Even though I don’t REALLY plan on it.
I plan on ‘escaping’ using my phone & books…

I need a vacation to a different country for a while….
that would feel so nice…

I just miss people… too much.. I think that’s what’s wrong with me.
I haven’t felt the same, It’s not good.
I think I’m done talking now, none of this probably made any sense…

If anyone did read this… Bravo, you just wasted your own time, I wish I could give it back to you. 


  1. There's been a lot of people feeling pressure about post secondary stuff lately. My relatives ask too many questions and I feel stressed out.

    One of my friends, when asked what she wanted to do when she grew up, replied,"Be happy and avoid extended homelessness." I think that's a pretty good plan.

    1. I know exactly how that is. People, specifically family, keeps on telling my how i have to pick a school and blah blah blah.

      i really, really like that plan.