sestina

I watched the making of words
and built a hole in which to fall
in case my soul is taken,
if only broken, but with a tender
heart. Don’t you see the water
flowing down my eyes?

And if only you could see my eyes
because they’re burning with your words
brighter than a July morning. Not even water
could put it out. Because even if I’m falling
your hands are so tender,
even though they’re taking.

I watched you take
away my eyes
the ones you loved, tenderly,
and whispered words
to make me fall.
You became my life, my water.

But the plants you planted weren’t watered
enough for them to grow and take
form. When I realized I had fallen
it was too late. I already closed my eyes,
I was already blind to everything but your words.
You made me tender.

You looked at me in my tender
mind, the moments I played with water.
You hid your knives with words
and slashed the liberty, taken.
I didn’t love your eyes,
but I kept falling.

Even when the leaves became crisp in fall
and the soil under my feet was tender
I still remembered your eyes
and I couldn’t wash you away with water.
I promised myself to never be taken
again by spoken words.

It became like falling and being buried under water
remembering your tender lies taking
until your very eyes burned these words.

You know when you’re just sitting here and you can feel something coming? You’re not quite sure if it’s good or bad, but it’s something. It’s a feeling that overwhelms, captivates, your brain. 
It takes over leaving hardly any room for anything else. Weirdly enough though, it doesn’t paint a picture. It’s an image, a thought, as blank as can be, but regardless you can’t help but feel like it’s something good… that whatever it is that’s coming your way is good. 
Maybe.

things i love because i couldn't think of anything else to blog about and this is in no particular order and it is by no means EVERYTHING i love :b

I love standing in the rain and closing my eyes, releasing every thought in my head.

I love spend the night at a campfire with close friends till 4 in the morning.

I love going to a concert and feeling the music through you.

I love soft, warm cookies fresh out of the oven.

I love taking long, warm showers.

I love being cold and then having a bunch of blankets to cuddle up in to stay extra warm.

I love standing in the middle of a field or the woods in the middle of the summer at night, watching thousands of fireflies light up around me.

I love being distracted from my mind, and actually being able to be happy.

I love just sitting and listening to amazing music for hours.

I love doodling on papers instead of taking notes in class.

I love when we win softball tournaments.

I love going to the beach.

I love how peaceful under the ocean is.

I love being able to cuddle up with my blanket and heart shaped pillow thingy with arms at night.

I love the feeling I get in my stomach when I'm on a roller coaster.

I love adventures.

I love sweatshirt and jeans type of weather.