so i got bored and decided to make my blog a tad different.
you like, or no?

so guys.
GUNGOR.
i went to their concert last night with some awesome people,
we really didn't know what to expect,
except what our albuquerquen friends had said about it.
but..
HOLY BANANAS.
it was like, the best concert i've ever been to.
and that's coming from an avid concert go-er.
and i totally needed that in my life right now too.
i literally can't even grasp how awesome it was.
if you don't know who Gungor is,
i HIGHLY recommend you look them up,
and then go to the concert.
sadly,
i didn't get a chance to take pictures,
they had asked up to shut off our phones because they were recording a live cd,
which is AWESOME.
and really, taking pictures was like, the last thing on my mind during it.
i really don't have many words to describe it's brilliant-ness.
it  was completely alexythemia-inspiring.

by the way, did you know if you say any positive word in a British accent,
it makes it at leassst 73842x more positive? :b

so friends,
go check out Gungor.
now.

love and all that. :3

Time passes on, with no hope of changing its course of direction. 
The universe moves its gears and the world turns once again. 
It moves through civilizations, generations, traditions, and families. 
It’s a mysterious thing it is, one may find themselves wanting more of it, others find themselves wanting to pause it. 
Some wishing to rewind it and some wishing to end it. 
It's a part of everything thing just as much as everything is a part of it. 
It will pass you by in the blink of an eye if you don’t stop to realize it, then again many have tried and it still results in the same outcome, it slips through your hands like fresh sand from a beach. 
It will pass us by as it has passed many before us, but when it comes time for that last grain of sand to slip through your fingers hopefully, just hopefully you can look back on time and see what its done, how its changed the world, 
how it changed you. 

i haven't put pictures up in a whilllle c:

I wish I could be standing on a mountain somewhere, or a nice area that overlooks cities upon cities. Where people are so tiny that they are just a mere blur of color and cars are moving dots. Buildings look like little squares and rectangles. I don’t want to be as high as a plane, I want to be able to see cities and then mountains and lots of trees and flowers. A sun shining bright keeping me nice and toasty but with a cool breeze that keeps me chill. I want to feel like I’m above the world, even if it’s only for a few spare minutes. I want to indulge in all the nature that city life hides. I want to feel free and liberated, able to do whatever I want without being judged a single second. I want to be able to scream to the top of my lungs and not have any care in the world. I want to lay down and stare up at the sky and just watch the clouds maze on by, forming new shapes and figures; letting my imagination soar.

I just want a perfect, beautiful, everlasting moment that I can fully grasp on; let that onset burst of happiness captivate me and swallow me whole. I just want that one sinful taste of pure bliss to call my own.

The world is too heavy,
too big for my shoulders,
come take the weight off me, now.

Thousands of answers,
for one simple question,
come take the weight off me, now.

I'm like a kid who just won't let it go,
Twisting and turning the colours in rows,
I'm so intensified that's what it is.
This is my Rubik's Cube
And all i can't figure it out.

We're lost in the playground,
Late night nostalgia,
open the sky for me, now.

Friends round the fire,
Outside in December
Open the sky for me now.

I'm like a kid who just won't let it go,
Twisting and turning the colours in rows,
I'm so intensified thats what it is.
This is my Rubik's Cube
And all i can't figure it out.

Credits roll over,
the edge of the horizons,
but I haven't discovered yet.

I'm like a kid who just won't let it go,
Twisting and turning the colours in rows,
I'm so intensified thats what it is.
This is my Rubik's Cube
And all I can't figure it out. 

here's just.. 
some things i'm feeling at the mo.

1) I've been very insecure, and I don't know why. I'm usually the opposite.
2) I feel like I’ll never achieve at anything in life.
3)  Caring more about others then I do myself is very true, sometimes I'm not the biggest fan of myself, but I would never let anything happen to my friends and family.
4) It feels like my parents aren’t proud of me.
5) I’m afraid I won’t be able to function living on my own. All of this college business is freaking me out.
6) I’m not depressed, I just don’t really know how I feel.
8) I think I've been changing. I don't really know if it's for the better, or the worse though.
9) I over think everything.
10) I don't actually hate softball anymore. I was just going through a rough time at the beginning. Communication isn't the easiest thing for me to do all the time.
11) Thinking about you makes me smile.
12) I really am trying. Hard. In pretty much everything that I do. 
13) Why do I always miss one little strip of hair when I shave? Hahahah... does this ever happen to anyone else? Cause it seriously happens every time for me.

happy things:

tea

good music

a nice read

your smile

kittens

rainy days

old photos

disney movies

i got this book yesterday c:

maybe it'll help remove some of this stress.

i hate stress.

do you ever feel like

EVERYTHING

is stressful?

seriously, everything.

physics is probably number one on the list though.

i think my topic for this book will be cats :b

i don't know why

i don't even have a cat.

but i like cats.

MEOW.

i think all the stress in the world

should

fall off a cliff

and die,

forever,

and never come back.

but then again,

maybe some stress is good..

like,

what if it's one of those things that just balances out the world.

it could be.

we will never know

anywhoo,

i'm hungry,

and it's almost lunch,

so therefore,

i shall go,

and eat.

i bid you all goodbye.

so 

i
hate
physics.

and softball.

my teacher isn't even in the class room right now.

its just two others and i.

i'm still sore, grr.

:c